When I retire, I want to learn printmaking from Joe Dixon.
I could fill a second lifetime studying just Joe's ability to capture the soul of an idea and portray it in a few simple lines and images. Really lovely stuff.
But I also want to learn ceramics from Susanne Storer.
Suzannne's platters and butter trays decorate half of the kitchens in Utah, but her larger ceramics have bloomed beyond functionality to simply gorgeous.
After that, I also want to learn sand painting from Sally Browning in Salt Lake City.
Laurie Call, of North Salt Lake, makes me think that the ancient Egyptian art of encaustic drawing with wax is the way to go.
And photography? Oh, wow, where to start?
When I see beautiful work, I think it would be amazingly cool to learn how to do it. That's why I came away from this year's Black and White Competition at the Eccles Community Art Center honestly torn.
If there were an art supply store next door, my credit card would have melted.
Two things will strike you about this show, which opened Friday and runs through Feb. 26: The stuff is absolutely amazing, and it was all done by your friends and neighbors.
Ogden, especially at the Eccles, is getting a name as the place to show art. This year's Black and White show, open to any medium but only two colors, has 240 pieces, chosen from 356 entries from all over the state.
And these people are good.
Peter Ellis, of Ogden, took a photograph of a rose, a simple flower. Through some magic, he made it into a delicate portrayal of tones and shadings. It is so heartbreakingly lovely, I suspect he has found that 11th zone that, rumor has it, Ansel Adams kept only to himself.
Richard Caramadre, of Salt Lake City, produced a print in his darkroom that shows a simple rock formation with water flowing by in Zion National Park.
In his skilled hands, the formation becomes a crystal clear vision of depth, and the water is transformed into milky clouds of flowing cotton. The guy really knows his shutter speeds.
Dixon's print, "Gospel Choir," is a striking mix of African symbols and singing faces. Joe is a huge fan of African art, and this captures the fervor and heritage of African-American religious singing.
Give yourself time to wander. This is a big show, the Eccles is small, gems are tucked into nooks and crannies.
Judy Elsley's tiny handmade quilt, "Layer After Layer," is easy to miss. It's hanging in the dining room right against the door jamb as you walk in, so step across the threshold and do a 180 to your right.
To my mind, the judges messed up not giving Best of Show to two handmade books by Mary Wells, of Ogden.
They're on the piano in the main room, next to the also-easy-to-miss daguerreotype by Weber State University teacher Tyler Suppha-Atthasitt's. Wells' books are both fun and drop-dead gorgeous: She produced two hand-drawn and lettered books with alphabetized sayings about dogs and dragons.
You've heard the sayings before -- "If your dog doesn't like someone, you probably shouldn't either" and "Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup" -- but the execution is so lovingly done, I read both cover to cover.
And yet the judges only gave one an honorable mention?
No accounting for taste.
Wells' work is so simple, you will wonder, "Why didn't I think of that?" but so lovely, you will spend a lifetime learning how to do it.
Go see it, buy a pen and get started.
Wasatch Rambler is the opinion of Charles Trentelman. You can call him at 801-625-4232 or email him at ctrentelman@standard.net. He also blogs at www.standard.net.
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