Cursing the NFL for not offering a game every evening, Morty slapped his remote into warp drive and sped through the high-def channels looking for sports. He inexplicably paused on a tennis match long enough for his wife to plead, "Hold it there, dear." Morty, strictly a meat and potatoes sports fan, winced at the offering of steamed broccoli.
"This is the U.S. Open in New York," Bernice said. "Wud ja just look at the size of that crowd."
Just then, the TV announcer whispered, "Federer was down love-40, but Nadal double-faulted twice and netted a backhand drop shot, so now it's deuce."
"What the hell's this guy talking about?" groaned Morty.