BOUNTIFUL -- LaMar Taylor is convinced that there are methods to parenting that really work. He'd like to see the methods that don't -- those that enable bad behaviors and damage good kids -- become a thing of the past.
In his book, "The Actual Parent Handbook," Taylor, a Bountiful Junior High School guidance counselor, urges parents to seek out aids that provide the best parenting skills.
He cites advances in education and technology and markets flooded with communications and entertainment options to drive home the need to be more savvy with child-rearing.
"That's why we can't go into this parenting experience void of skills anymore," he writes in Chapter 6 of the book.
"We just can't wing it now," he said during a recent interview. "We have to learn the best methods and throw out old methods that should have been thrown out years ago."
People who know Taylor say they put a lot of stock in the advice he gives them, citing his 38 years of experience as an educator and school guidance counselor and almost 30 years as a father of six children. Taylor and his wife, Mary, also have 15 grandchildren.
"LaMar is a fountain of knowledge on a lot of different subjects," said Scott Woodbury, a South Weber councilman and Taylor's longtime friend and former college roommate.
Woodbury said Taylor owns a ranch and trains horses, has a love for music and is an accomplished pianist. He said the two of them have spent 25 years singing together as members of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and in other choral and a cappella groups since their years at Weber State University.
Taylor has performed in Los Angeles and other places with a singing group known as the Sanborn Singers.
"He has the type of personality that people like to be around," Woodbury said. "He has an honesty about him and a warmness. He listens to people and offers good advice -- sometimes I've asked for it and sometimes he just gives it to me."
Taylor said his book on parenting came as a surprise. He said he'd never wanted to write a book. It just was never a goal or a desire, he said.
"It was a freaky thing," Taylor said. "I was on an airplane with my wife, and I began writing. This stuff just started coming to me. By the time I got off the plane, I had several chapters written."
Taylor said the book had to be finished, because he realized he was writing the "parent's handbook" he joked about having during the years he raised his children. He said he would tell his children while growing up that they could not do things they asked to do because "Chapter 3 of the parent's handbook says children can't stay up after 9:30 at night."
"It was a joke, a game I played with them," he said. "They would roll their eyes and ask to see the book."
Taylor said when he got home after the plane ride, he began writing the book in earnest because he wanted to give it to his children. Once it was finished, he had it copied and bound, and he gave the handbook as Christmas presents to his grown kids.
After reading it, they began urging him to publish the book. Taylor said he decided to add some chapters and find a publisher. Both of the publishers he sought out wanted to publish the book, he said. He struck a deal with Tate Publishing, based in Oklahoma, and the book hit bookstores earlier this year. On Nov. 21, Taylor will appear at a book-signing from 4 p.m. to 6 p.m. at Barnes & Noble in Bountiful.
Besides helping students with class schedules, Taylor talks with junior high school-age children daily about school, family and personal problems.
He also conducts weekly counseling groups on grief, divorce and self-esteem for junior high students at Bountiful Junior High. He said he sees children with so many problems, "it is amazing that they continue to try to get through school."
He said his interactions with hurting children drove him to "try to get the book in as many hands as possible."
"The hope I give to parents is, it is never too late to change," Taylor said. "Children are very flexible, and if they feel you are really trying to do better, they will respond."
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