In this story, a young man was being picked on by his classmates in seminary, and because of that, he no longer wanted to attend.

Someone told him that by not attending, he was only hurting himself. He was preventing himself from learning vital spiritual lessons.

I’ve always remembered that story because it’s a crucial reminder that we are agents unto ourselves. We have the choice whether to do what is right even when it is hard.

The story also serves as an important reminder that we need to watch how we treat those around us. We might think our behavior doesn’t have a very large impact, but it can. It would be sad for someone if they used their agency to forfeit spiritual blessings because of how others used their agency to treat them, but it would also be sad for anyone who mistreated someone else and gave them cause to think they didn’t belong. Nobody should want to be thought of as one who contributed to someone felt like they didn’t belong.

Ryan Comer, Standard-Examiner

In his address at the October general conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Elder Gerrit W. Gong, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in the church, emphasized the importance of nobody being alone.

“In the parable of the good Samaritan, Jesus invites us to come to each other and to Him in His inn–His Church,” Elder Gong said. “He invites us to be good neighbors. The good Samaritan promises to return and recompense the care of those in His inn. Living the gospel of Jesus Christ includes making room for all in His restored Church.”

I wonder what goes through the average person’s mind when they think of “living the gospel of Jesus Christ.” Certainly it means doing all the things that are required to obtain a temple recommend. But I wonder if people think of “making room for all” in Christ’s church as a component of “living the gospel of Jesus Christ.” I will admit, if someone asked me what it meant to live the gospel of Jesus Christ, I don’t know that I would have mentioned that before I heard this talk. And yet, there’s no doubt that it’s true.

If “living the gospel of Jesus Christ includes making room for all in His restored Church,” then it’s necessary to think of more ways that we can accomplish that. I believe there are plenty of ways for us to make room for all according to our unique personality characteristics and abilities that can be revealed to us if it is our desire.

Giving some more specific counsel, Elder Gong continued:

“The spirit of ‘room in the inn’ includes ‘no one sits alone.’ When you come to church, if you see someone alone, will you please say hello and sit with him or her? This may not be your custom. The person may look or speak differently than you. And of course, as a fortune cookie might say, ‘A journey of gospel friendship and love begins with a first hello and no one sitting alone.’

“‘No one sits alone’ also means no one sits alone emotionally or spiritually. I went with a brokenhearted father to visit his son. Years earlier, the son was excited to become a new deacon. The occasion included his family buying him his first pair of new shoes.

“But at church, the deacons laughed at him. His shoes were new, but not fashionable. Embarrassed and hurt, the young deacon said he would never go again to church. My heart is still broken for him and his family.”

That’s a similar story to the one that I shared at the beginning but with a more disappointing ending. I just imagine how I would feel if I made a poor choice in how I interacted with someone and then that became a reason they never came back to church. We have more impact than we think.

“On the dusty roads to Jericho, each of us has been laughed at, embarrassed and hurt, perhaps scorned or abused,” Elder Gong said. “And with varying degrees of intent, each of us has also disregarded, not seen or heard, perhaps deliberately hurt others. It is precisely because we have been hurt and have hurt others that Jesus Christ brings us all to His inn. In His Church and through His ordinances and covenants, we come to each other and to Jesus Christ. We love and are loved, serve and are served, forgive and are forgiven. Please remember, ‘earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot heal’; earth burdens lighten–our Savior’s joy is real.”

Having been mistreated shouldn’t inspire us to leave the church; it should inspire us to go to church and try harder to serve others, to make sure others know that they are not alone. We have a unique opportunity because we have been hurt – and because we have hurt others – to help others at church.

“In 1 Nephi 19, we read: ‘Even the very God of Israel do [they] trample under their feet; … they set him at naught. … Wherefore they scourge him, and he suffereth it; and they smite him, and he suffereth it. Yea, they spit upon him, and he suffereth it,'” Elder Gong said.

“My friend Professor Terry Warner says the judging, scourging, smiting, and spitting were not occasional events that occurred only during Christ’s mortal life. How we treat each other–especially the hungry, the thirsty, those left out alone–is how we treat Him.”

Matthew 25:40 says, “… Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” So if by serving “the least of these” we are serving the Lord, then the inverse is true. When we mistreat “the least of these,” we are also mistreating the Lord.

“In His restored Church, we are all better when no one sits alone,” Elder Gong said. “Let us not simply accommodate or tolerate. Let us genuinely welcome, acknowledge, minister to, love. May each friend, sister, brother not be a foreigner or stranger but a child at home.”

It could be easy to think that because we aren’t blatantly mistreating other people that we are doing what is required. We may help when asked and generally show respect for others. But that is the bare minimum. That should not be the end goal. There needs to be a genuine care for others. I know when I have felt that and I know when I have not. It is a stark difference.

“Today many feel lonely and isolated,” Elder Gong said. “Social media and artificial intelligence can leave us yearning for human closeness and human touch. We want to hear each other’s voices. We want authentic belonging and kindness.

“There are many reasons we may feel we do not fit in at church–that, speaking figuratively, we sit alone. We may worry about our accent, clothes, family situation. Perhaps we feel inadequate, smell of smoke, yearn for moral cleanliness, have broken up with someone and feel hurt and embarrassed, are concerned about this or that Church policy. We may be single, divorced, widowed. Our children are noisy; we don’t have children. We didn’t serve a mission or came home early. The list goes on.

“Mosiah 18:21 invites us to knit our hearts together in love. I invite us to worry less, judge less, be less demanding of others–and, when needed, be less hard on ourselves. We do not create Zion in a day. But each ‘hello,’ each warm gesture, brings Zion closer. Let us trust the Lord more and choose joyfully to obey all His commandments.”

Again, making room for all in the Lord’s church is not optional. It is a commandment.

Although someone might feel alone at church based on various reasons, Elder Gong reminded us that we are we are not really alone “because of covenant belonging in Jesus Christ.” He quoted Joseph Smith, who said:

“It is left for us to see, participate in and help to roll forward the Latter-day glory, ‘the dispensation of the fullness of times … ,’ when the Saints of God will be gathered in one from every nation, and kindred, and people.”

Elder Gong added:

“God ‘doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; … that he may draw all men [and women] unto him. …

“‘… He inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; … and all are alike unto God.'”

Elder Gong went on to explain how coming unto God requires something of us.

“Conversion in Jesus Christ requires us to put off the natural man and worldly culture,” he said. “As President Dallin H. Oaks teaches, we are to give up any tradition and cultural practice that is contrary to the commandments of God and to become Latter-day Saints. He explains, ‘There is a unique gospel culture, a set of values and expectations and practices common to all [the] members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.’ Gospel culture includes chastity, weekly attendance at church, abstaining from alcohol, tobacco, tea, and coffee. It includes honesty and integrity, understanding we move forward, not upward or downward, in Church positions.”

Of course, nobody is perfect, and mistakes are made. But Elder Gong reminded us that “the peace of Jesus Christ is meant for us personally.”

He said:

“Recently a young man earnestly asked, ‘Elder Gong, can I still go to heaven?’ He wondered if he could ever be forgiven. I asked his name, listened carefully, invited him to talk with his bishop, gave him a big hug. He left with hope in Jesus Christ.

“I mentioned the young man in another setting. Later I received an unsigned letter that began, ‘Elder Gong, my wife and I have raised nine kids … and served two missions.’ But ‘I always felt I would not be allowed in the celestial kingdom … because my sins as a youth were so bad!’

“The letter continued, ‘Elder Gong, when you told about the young man gaining hope of forgiveness, I was filled with joy, beginning to realize that maybe I [could be forgiven].’ The letter concludes, ‘I even like myself now!'”

Concluding his talk, Elder Gong said:

“Covenant belonging deepens as we come to each other and to the Lord in His inn. The Lord blesses us all when no one sits alone.”

Contact Ryan Comer at rcomer@standard.net.