Ah yes, just the warm, tobacco-scented welcome every homeowner desires. My response? “Ain’t going to happen, my friend.” Over the next two years, as payback I assume, he would steal our lawnmower, weed-eater, expensive custom Giant OCR Limited carbon fiber road bike, and a winter coat. I could have chalked it up to someone else, maybe a random passerby, or a very fashion-forward thief who took advantage of the opportunity. But any lingering doubt vanished later that summer when I wandered past a makeshift yard sale in, you guessed it, his front yard…and spotted all these items, even the winter coat, hanging proudly on display like some kind of suburban ransom note. He even offered me a “returning customer discount.” Boldness? Ten out of ten. Self-awareness? Tragically absent. Turns out, tobacco wasn’t the only stuff he had been smoking.

Sadly, I’ve learned I’m far from alone in this little rite of passage, i.e., finding out my ideal neighborhood isn’t exactly what my naive dream promised. Turns out, there’s a whole club of us out here who thought we were moving into happy and harmonious homes in the heart of community happenings, only to discover we’ve got front-row seats to chaos, crime, drug deals, and an occasional amateur yard sale fencing operation. While this would not be the last of my suburb surprises, it wasn’t the first either. But alas, I am not alone.

In fact, just this week I met with a former client who had moved from their “perfect” neighborhood in our neck of the woods, to a different state to help care for their ailing parents. They are now ready to make the move back except this time, they don’t want to live right next to the mink farm. Admittedly, it was only mildly odorous when they first took occupancy, during the harsh Winter months of ice and snow. They quickly learned, however, that when spring hit, the musk of mink stink was there to stay. This time, they requested a different location.

As Realtors, we are prohibited from “steering” clients into or away from certain areas, and with good reason. However, learning about a neighborhood before making one of the largest purchases of a lifetime, can be openly accomplished with a dash of tasteful discretion and minimal subtleness.

As a buyer myself on occasion, it is not above or beneath me to knock on neighbors’ doors and ask about the neighborhood. If that seems a bit too bold for one’s liking, it is certainly easy enough to park the car down the street and walk the neighborhood. Perhaps if I had done this before my first home purchase, I would have learned early to lock up and keep watch.

Another helpful hint would be to drop by the neighborhood at different times of day, or different days of the week, and actually get out of the car. Take a stroll, sniff the air (hopefully not near trash day), and tune into the sounds and sights around you. Use all your senses to get the real vibe of the place. You’d be amazed what a Tuesday evening can reveal that a sunny Saturday afternoon won’t.

Don’t forget to do the cyber recon on the neighborhood as well. There is so much information that can be accessed online about schools, crime, safety, community events and local issues. Many subdivisions even have neighborhood Facebook groups. See what people are saying. There is always someone in every neighborhood that can’t wait to spill the beans. Find the proverbial Gladys Kravitz and get the real scoop. It is worth the time spent to ensure a sound investment.

Jen Fischer is an associate broker and Realtor. She can be reached at 801-645-2134 or jen@jen-fischer.com.