Brexit trumps Justin Timberlake’s Twitter troubles
Back when our three children were teenagers, any time my wife and I would have even the slightest of disagreements in front of them, our youngest daughter would immediately seize upon the opportunity.
“Woo-hoo!” she’d shout, pumping both fists in the air. “Two Christmases!”
This happened every time, despite my repeated reminder to her that if Dad were left in charge of one of those celebrations, it would look less like two Christmases and more like one Christmas and one of the lesser federal holidays — say, a really laid-back Columbus Day, or perhaps Washington’s Birthday.
For whatever reason, I was reminded of that family memory when news broke of last Thursday’s Brexit vote, wherein the citizens of the United Kingdom were considering seeking a divorce from the European Union. Two Christmases indeed.
I confess that, in the beginning, I was completely enamored with this story out of the U.K. — if for no other reason than it’s really, really fun to use the term “Brexit” in a sentence. But Brexit fatigue quickly set in over this portmanteau of the words “British” and “exit.”
It’s sort of like how “Uptown Funk,” the 2014 hit song from Mark Ronson and Bruno Mars, was catchy and fun the first few thousand times you heard it on the radio. But eventually, it got to the point where every time that distinctive “(clap) do-doo-do” intro of the 1980s-funk-inspired single would commence, you’d fairly tear a rotator cuff in your haste to change the station.
Seriously. I was in the wilds of Southern Utah for much of last week — out of smartphone range for the most part. And even I, by the weekend, had grown weary of the all-Brexit-all-the-time talk. So, of course, I’m thinking what you could really use right now is yet another analysis piece about the U.K. exit from the EU.
Look, I get it. I realize this is an important issue affecting the world economy and all. I’m just not certain I want to live in a society where we care more about what’s happening across the Atlantic than right here in our own backyard. I mean, Brexit has been hogging media attention that might normally have been dedicated to Justin Timberlake’s current Twitter troubles.
Why, even TMZ — the gold standard in tawdry celebrity gossip — jumped on the Brexit media bandwagon with a video headline that read: “John Lennon’s son Julian really drunk, really pissed over Brexit.” Well, now. When the offspring of a member of The Beatles is displeased with British politics, you know you’ve got a real story.
Near as I can figure, this whole Brexit thing is the Brits’ payback for them having to endure all of our Donald Trump coverage. Exhibit A: One of the leaders of the Brexit movement, and the front runner for next prime minister of the U.K., is none other than Boris Johnson.
Boris Johnson, people.
“The Boris” is basically the British equivalent of “The Donald.” I defy you to Google images of “Boris Johnson” — with his comical facial expressions and otherworldly hued mop of hair — and tell me he doesn’t remind you of a certain beloved Republican presidential candidate. Really, the only difference between the two is that while both politicians may be known for saying silly, bombastic things to the media, they sound much more intelligent coming out of Johnson’s mouth — seeing as he’s saying them with a refined British accent.
Well played, England. Well played.
Although Brexit coverage in the media may mercifully be on the decline, there’s plenty more where that came from. By my count, there are at least 27 more countries that can threaten to exit the European Union. We could have a Spexit. A Grexit. A Frexit. And even a Czexit.
And finally, in the wake of Thursday’s decision to leave the EU, U.K. voters may now be experiencing buyer’s remorse — many say they never expected the referendum to pass and only voted in favor of the separation as a form of protest. Some have even called for another vote on the issue.
But relax, my English friends. Because while Neil Sedaka tells us that breaking up is hard to do, there’s no denying a British exit from the European Union does have its advantages.
Or in the words of my daughter: “Woo-hoo! Two Boxing Days!”
Contact Mark Saal at 801-625-4272 or msaal@standard.net. Follow him on Twitter at @Saalman. Like him on Facebook at facebook.com/SEMarkSaal.