I’ve found myself either listening to or involved in discussions about this topic. The question haunts every parent or influencer of every young adult trying to make sense of the senseless assassination of Charlie Kirk last week. It leaves us wanting a strong, comforting answer for our confused young people — and for ourselves.

Multiple conversations on multiple divisive topics arise. Gun control, gender issues, social media influence, freedom of speech, left and right wing perspectives all generate lively and vigorous debate as opposing strident voices clamor for the opportunity to be heard. The problem, of course, is that in those distracting conversations we take sides. And that’s precisely what we shouldn’t be doing right now: taking sides.

Instead, what is needed by our young people whose hearts and faith and hopes have been wounded is some kind of unity — a unity that tells them that despite all our differences, all our vast array of differences about everything we can possibly dredge up — we still have common ground.

What they seem to want — in fact, what we all seem to want — is an assurance that basically, most of us human beings are still good. Most of us would rather smile than frown. We prefer good over bad, positive over negative, right over wrong. We still tend to want to help someone in need. We might not actually have the courage to do it, but we want to believe our collective tendencies flow in that direction.

Our young people need to know this. Right down to the youngest, our youngsters need to know and feel goodness in their worlds. Parents want that for their children. That’s why we go

to great lengths to take care of our kids in a positive way — to feed them, clothe them, send them to school, welcome them home, feed them again, help them with homework, play a little catch in the backyard, and tuck them in at night with a hug. We want them to build up enough good memories, strong values, and a sense of security so that when strange or awful or unpredictable things happen in their world, they have something solid to hang onto while they process the fears that go along with those moments. Kids who don’t have that kind of support are vulnerable.

Supremely wise parents are the ones who quietly extend their reach beyond their own families to also encircle those in need. It’s what we do. It’s what we teach our kids to do by our example. We’re in a hurting place right now. Charlie’s death on September 10th eclipsed the nation’s annual recognition of another tragedy — the September 11th attacks nearly a quarter of a century ago. Two tragedies in two days, perpetrated by malicious people. Some say the blows seem to be increasing in numbers and strength.

Whether or not they are, we are neither hopeless nor helpless victims. For every action there is an equal and positive reaction. Or there should be. To respond to intentional tragedies with anger, hatred, and blame only feeds into the negative. It takes deeply rooted character to sidestep the desire for rage and revenge. But to respond with a quiet, inner commitment to step up our personal circles of influence to bring about a balance of good is the critical, essential positive reaction. We have it in us. When we consider the battle raging for the well-being of our younger generations, we must find it in us.

If we can’t find the good, then we need to become the good — the quiet, powerful good that outweighs, outshines, and outmaneuvers the bad. Our young people need that from us.

Especially right now.