People to invite to your Halloween party: Doctors, lawyers, teachers, bus drivers, retail sales associates, construction workers, food-service employees, accountants, stay-at-home parents, homeless people, unemployed dolphin trainers, Donald Trump, just about anyone else on the planet.People ...
OGDEN — Hey, faithful newspaper readers! Sick and tired of the “lamestream” media? Think you could do a better job of:• Reporting on elections?• Covering your favorite sports teams?• Producing these twice-weekly columns?Or maybe you’ve just always wanted to be able to shout ...
I’ve never understood this irrational fear of clowns.America is currently in the grip of a full-fledged clown panic, and I’m struggling to comprehend it all.Clowns have never seemed scary or evil or even slightly unhinged to me. They just seem sad. And a bit off-putting. Maybe even a little ...
Whenever something would go south in our family, my father had an old line he liked to use.“Well, you know what they say,” he’d intone with a sad smile. “The rich get richer, and the poor get pregnant.”Ah, but as it turns out, that’s not all the poor get. Apparently, they also get ...
It’s time to talk about the elephant in the room.And, the donkey.With the presidential election just a month away, we need to have a frank discussion about the current state of U.S. politics. You know how they say that the two things you should never talk about in polite society are politics ...
<em>“WARNING! This column — like the majority of the writer’s previous attempts — may trigger intense feelings of anger, annoyance or apathy. It may even induce occasional bouts of intense nausea. If you experience any of these symptoms, you are encouraged to immediately ...
You know how you convince yourself that you absolutely hate something, only to discover that — as it turns out — you actually love it?When I was a lad of 8 or 9 years of age, I’d somehow convinced myself that I hated cheesecake. I’d never even tried the stuff, but just the combination ...
Have you any idea how difficult it is to responsibly dispose of more than 500 plastic one-gallon milk jugs?It’s nowhere near as easy as one might think. As proof, I offer Exhibit A: I’ve been driving around for the last couple of weeks with the bed of my pickup truck filled nearly to the ...
A football player refuses to stand for the national anthem, and suddenly he’s the fourth-most-hated person in America.How does that happen?One can at least understand why Barack Obama, Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton make the list. But Colin Kaepernick? To borrow from the “<a ...
The registered trademark for the pharmaceutical company Mylan is the three-word slogan, “Seeing is believing.”Well, I’ve seen it, and I still don’t believe it.Indeed, many of us have road rash on our chins after hearing tales of the amazingly pricey EpiPen. In a world where old ...
