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Faith in community restored / S. Ogden family's burned flag replaced with love, sympathy
By KRISTINE SHAWKEYSOUTH OGDEN -- An outpouring of love, support and American flags showed up at the Toles home Thursday, renewing the family's faith in the community.
With smiles and humble hearts, family members accepted a continual stream of flags dropped off by people from all over the community who came offering support and sympathy.
The Toles family had returned home at 4231 S. 675 East after working the polls Tuesday and proudly hung a flag on their roof to celebrate their new hope for America and support for President-elect Barack Obama.
Within an hour, the flag was burning. South Ogden police are continuing their investigation into the incident.
Family members, who are black, felt the attack threatened their political beliefs and, more personally, their race.
The flag giving began early Thursday morning when an employee from the Weber County Assessor's Office dropped off a flag and a letter apologizing for the lack of caring and respect demonstrated by some.
"Know that even though some people have different political views, we are all Americans and deserve the rights in the Constitution that so many have shed blood for," the letter read.
One man left his truck running as he handed the family a flag on a pole and said they would have a hundred flags by the end of the day.
"I felt better because, when it first happened, we felt alone in the world, and now to see the people that care and there are other Americans that felt outraged about what happened, it feels good," said Alexander Toles.
"When it first happened, there was sadness and anger. Now I feel relief. It feels better to not feel alone in our community."
Members of VFW Post 1481 and American Legion Post 9 gave the Toles two flags.
"Both organizations are made up of veterans that were appalled by this, that somebody would basically assault these good people and they would assault the American flag," said Dennis Howland, an Ogden resident and junior vice commander for the state of Utah VFW.
Clifford Porter, vice commander of VFW Post 1481, said the burning of the Toles' flag was "not American, unnecessary and personally revolting."
Casey Kunimura, 84, of North Ogden, brought a flag to the Standard-Examiner and asked that it be taken to the family.
Kunimura, who is of Japanese descent, is one of the thousands of Japanese-Americans who were driven out of California at the start of World War II but still joined the U.S. Army. He fought in Europe with the 442nd Regimental Combat Team.
In a note to the Toles family, he said he knows about discrimination.
"As soon as I picked up the paper, that was the first thing that hit me," he said. "It sort of made my blood boil."
He was not alone.
Ed Charters, a Vietnam veteran who lives in Clearfield, said, "I get my paper about 5:30 in the morning and was just infuriated at what happened. ... I went out and bought a flag and took it over to them, one they can put up on their house."
By the time he got there, four others had done the same thing, he said, and more were coming.
"I told them this just shows you that we all don't think that stupid," he said later. "This is absolutely against the grain of every good American in this country."
Donna Toles said the family was hesitant to hang another flag in fear of what could happen again, and how people would respond.
"The feeling behind it is the same -- we're proud and have a right to be. It feels better to know everybody doesn't feel that way," she said.
By the end of the day, the family had received 13 flags and hung up six of them, Donna Toles said Thursday night.
As to whoever burned their flag, the family believes they got the message and hope the negative attention toward what they did will change them.
The family said the support they received has restored their pride and faith in the community.
"This is our world, this is where we live. You don't let the fear stifle you. We rise above it and continue to be Americans," Alexander Toles said.
"I think they intended for us to crumble and not do anything about it, but we're going to stand up for what we believe in.
"The time for change has come, and no longer will we be stepped on and not had our voices heard."
(Updated November 6, 2008, 11:42 p.m.)
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SOUTH OGDEN -- Proud family members hung a flag on the roof of their home Tuesday night to celebrate their new hope for America and support for President-elect Barack Obama.
But within an hour, the flag was on fire, sending a message of fear to the family, which is black.
The Toles family returned home at 4231 S. 675 E. around 10:30 p.m. Tuesday after working the polls on Election Day. Just minutes before walking inside, they heard the news that Obama had won, and they walked into the house, cheering his victory.
"We were just so happy. We were really into this election, not so much because he's a black person. If it had been another black man who wouldn't change things, I wouldn't have voted for him," said Debbie Toles Sackie.
"I didn't vote for the black man or the white man, I voted for the right man.
"I told the kids, 'Now you can do anything you want with your life.' I also told them they couldn't go to school and gloat, that they needed to carry themselves with dignity."
The family decided to put out the American flag to celebrate.
"First, I put the flag in the ground, where it only stood a couple of inches high," said Alexander Toles, 20. "That's not how I felt -- I wanted it higher."
Toles decided to hang the flag on the roof directly above the front door.
A short time later, Anthony Toles, Sackie's brother, was sitting on the couch in the front room when he saw the flag burning. He ran outside, pulled the flag down and stomped out the flames.
The family was emotional and teary-eyed Wednesday while recounting the incident.
"I didn't know what to say but, 'Oh my God, who burnt the flag?' They've gone too far. I can't be proud there's a black president? I never thought I'd have to be afraid of this happening," Sackie said.
Alexander Toles, holding the burned flag, said, "I was so proud to put this up, and then it killed me to tear it down while on fire."
Donna Toles, Sackie's sister, said she and her 16-year-old daughter lost a family member when they were in a house fire when the family lived in New York.
The girl was hysterical after Tuesday's fire, fearing for her life and pleading to move out of the neighborhood.
After calming down, the girl realized she had a right to live there and didn't want anyone to take that away from her, Donna Toles said.
She acknowledges there have been problems between the family and neighbors, but they are still baffled as to why anyone would burn their flag.
"I don't know who or why they did this. We have problems with a lot of neighbors. I don't disrespect anyone and don't deserve this," Donna Toles said.
The Toleses are the only blacks on the block and said they have had problems in the neighborhood since they first moved in about 10 years ago. The family said neighbors started a petition to get them out of the house when they first moved in.
"I'm now to the point I'm scared. I'm scared for what I'll do to my protect my family. People have died for a lot less," Sackie said.
South Ogden Mayor George Garwood said Wednesday he is aware of the incident and the possible racial issues in the neighborhood, but is surprised by the way the Toleses are being treated.
"Being an African-American myself in a predominantly white community, you're always going to have some prejudices and discriminations. I have not felt that, and I've lived in South Ogden for 30 years," Garwood said.
"We won't tolerate someone coming on people's private property and destroying their belongings."
The Toleses, originally from New York City, had lived in other areas of Utah, Ogden and North Ogden before moving to South Ogden, and said they never ran into racial problems anywhere else in the state.
The family had never heard someone direct a racial slur at them until they moved to South Ogden.
"I feel like America's changed, but not the people here in South Ogden. You can believe whatever you want to believe. We are in America, but just don't put it on me," Sackie said.
There have been a number of calls to South Ogden police, made both by the Toles family and neighbors, the great majority dealing with noise and nuisance complaints.
Walking from door to door, talking with neighbors, the animosity and tension among the families is apparent. Several neighbors interviewed Wednesday said they did not want to be quoted by name about the flag burning for fear of retaliation.
Neighbors said they have had problems with the family for years and they "don't really care what happens over there anymore."
One neighbor said the Toles family is always crying racism and admitted to being part of the concerns when the family first moved in.
"It wouldn't surprise me if they set the fire themselves to stir things up and make us look bad."
The neighbors denied any racism on their part, blaming the tension on the problems the family caused over the years.
The Toleses were upset by the neighbors' accusation that they are to blame for the fire, and still believe there are discrimination and race issues in every direction they look.
"Why would we do it to make them look bad? That's crazy. Why would I burn down our flag to make them look bad? I just want people to leave me alone," said Donna Toles.
"I don't know why somebody would do something awful like that -- they don't even know me."
South Ogden police are investigating the case, said Marci Edwards, the department's spokeswoman.
For now, the Toleses plan to continue living their life and being the same people inside and out of their home while trying to understand what happened.
"This is America," Sackie said.
"You can be who you want to be. If you ain't changed now, you never gonna be changed."
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